Cinco De Mayo

Happy Cinco De Mayo everyone! Remember to stay safe on the roads tonight, please, for the sake of our children. I personally am NOT looking forward to taking Michael to theater practice in downtown Kent tonight, right in the midst of the college festivities. Hopefully the crowds won't get too large, or too loud until we are outta there!! :)

Mother's Day is this weekend and I cannot wait to spend the day at church with my family. We will go to church, then have lunch out together, then come home and do Bible Study...it will be a great day. I feel so unbelievably blessed and privileged to be the mother of two great boys. Do you ever sit back and really think about God's divine plan? I do. God specifically chose Samuel and Michael to grow in my womb, He chose to me to their mother, He entrusted their lives to me. He knew those boys before I ever did, and He knew their hearts, and He knew that I was going to be the one raising them! It boggles my mind!! I cannot think of any better gift in this world. In fact, the only other gift that tops that is Jesus dying on the cross to forgive our sins! God is so good to us, makes me wonder why it is so easy for people to turn away.

I don't just sit and think about how amazing it is to have my children, I also think of how God chose my mom just for me. I often sit back and observe my friends with their parents, and I never get a jealous feeling. I am always SO THANKFUL that I had my mom, that I was raised the way I was, that God gave me such a giving mother. Again, HIS divine plan amazes me.

Okay, enough about Mother's Day, we still 4 days!!

I have been thinking about the divorce a lot lately, and thinking about how much I do not want to go to court. I wish you could do this divorce stuff all over the phone. I just keep fearing that my emotions will get the better of me, and it will be viewed the wrong way. My lawyer will always say, "I know this is hard honey." when I start crying. What she doesn't know is that I am not crying over the divorce itself, I am crying over the 10 years of my life that I believed to be something other than what they were. I am finally feeling free about the divorce...and what I mean by that is, I feel like God has taken the guilt from me. I could not get right with it in my heart for a long time, I could never get right with my first divorce....I believe divorce is wrong. But, it was taken out of my hands, and after many sleepless nights, God took that burden from me. And I couldn't be more grateful.

Okay, enough about the divorce, we still have 16 days!!

To get everyone in the mood for Mother's Day, here are some of my favorite MOM shots...

Just Stuff.

Today was another amazing day, PRAISE GOD! I absolutely love church days!! We got to sing MIGHTY TO SAVE today and that is my current favorite song. :-) Gives me chills. Here is the video, please listen to it, and really absorb the lyrics...



Amazing right?!?!

Okay, just wanted to do a little "life update" blog...

Things have been getting so much better here, I just cannot say it enough. We have (as a family) really learned how lean on God, pray together, and walk the walk together. It is so encouraging having the entire family lift you up everyday....and it is a blessing to be able to lift them up. Though I am human, and by birth a sinner, I serve a God that forgives me for EVERYTHING I do, and loves me, and blesses my life. It is an amazing journey that I am on, and I pray that all of you who are not on it will join me.

May is a busy month for us here...we finish up schooling, my divorce will be final, Michael will have his first theatrical performances, we have Relay fundraising to do, etc... I am hoping to keep everyone caught up through the blog, but I may get too overwhelmed, we shall see.

Here are the boys RELAY videos that they wrote themselves, if you are able to spread the word or even donate...GREAT!! Either way, please watch these two RENDONKULOUSLY adorable videos....





Not a whole lot of other stuff is going on. I do want to ask that all of my believer friends will pray for my divorce to go smoothly on May 21st. We have to go to trial on one issue, and I just want to remain calm, instead of becoming a blubbering idiot! (What can I say, I am an emotional girl!) Please pray for the entire day, not just the trial...I am sure it will be a heavy day for me. The divorce will be final as I walk out of the court room, and even though I am VERY happy ;) with my life now, I am still saying goodbye to 10 years...it is not gonna be easy.

On another note-

If you have anything you want to ask me, feel free to on FORMSPRING! It is a neat site where you can ask me completely anonymous questions that I choose to, or not to, answer. Nothing is off limits, but I have had a few questions that I chose to delete...for different reasons. Well here it is...

A year today.

This time last year I was crying, screaming, couldn't breathe, hysterical wreck! I came home to a note on my door that changed my life forever. My marriage of over ten year was over.

It took eight months for the crying spells to stop.

It took nine months to quit thinking I could not have guy friends.

It took ten months to realize that just because I was married didn't mean I was taken.

It took eleven months to quit walking around the house looking at memories.

It took twelve months to find myself and finally become happy again.

For a year now I have thought about how I would handle this day, and I must say, I thought I would be a mess. But I woke up bright and early and went to do a Relay for Life Fundraiser with the boys. Then I was so exhausted I came home and got a nap. Then it happened...

I woke up to hundreds of notes all over the house from my kids. All of the notes were funny, and a bit off color. There were semi-knocking the original note I got last May, but it was so hilarious. My kiddos crack me up. I have to say, that has been the highlight of my day! And I am so proud of myself for being able to have a sense of humor about things now...that is huge for me!

One note read (the one on my bedroom door, where the original note was)

Dear Hollie-

I am gonna go jump off
a cliff with Samuel or
something until my life
gets better.

- (hiding the name they signed)

They were all silly like that, but you have to admit, creative....and funny!

As if my day could not get better (seriously, not sarcastically)...my brother and his family donated 100 dollars to my Relay for Life goal...which means I met my goal!!! YAHOO! (Like they haven't done enough of something!!)

Thanks you Sam, Kathleen, Robby, and Andrew for supporting me and the American Cancer Society! Love you all more than words can express.

And then, on top of that....

My mom and dad bought a LUMINARIA for me, and that is so exciting. Last year I had 2, some people had like 10, it was a amazing! Luminaria lights our track at night during the Luminaria Ceremony, and they stay lit the rest of the night. It is beyond beautiful.

Thank you guys for making sure I had one this year!! I love you both so much! <3

And again...like it couldn't get better...

All of the kiddos that went fundraising today did such a great job, we sold out of candy before noon!!!!!! To top it off, they made over $400 dollars today! GO TEAM!

Yep, it was a pretty amazing day. And tomorrow I get to go to church and hear God's message, and spend some time in song and prayer! God is so good to me.