Falling in.

After watching a fascinating movie called "Join Us," and several other biography shows about cults...I felt compelled to write about my thoughts on what a cult is. No need to take to offense, this is simply one girl's opinion. :-)

Before I start, I want to tell you what christiananswers.net lists as the top ten cults in America today...

1. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormonism)
2. The Watchtower Bible and Tract Society (Jehovah's Witnesses)
3. The Church of Scientology
4. The Twelve Tribes
5. The Holy Spirit Association for the Unification of World Christianity (Unification Church)
6. The International Churches of Christ (Boston Movement)
7. The Family (Children of God)
8. Christian Identity Movement (Aryan Nations, Christian Identity Church, Klu Klux Klan, etc.)
9. The Nation of Islam (Black Muslims)
10. United Pentecostal Church (UPC)


Churches are not the only cults out there, I have seen yoga groups that were cults. It is crazy how manipulated humans can be. Before I go on any further I want to tell you about me. I am a King James only, Bible believing Christian, with unwavering faith. Obviously, I do not believe that all churches are bad, God made the church...people made them into what they are today. I also want to let you know that I fully believe I was a part of a cult, and it was so horrible. Let me share my story...

I grew up Assembly of God/Pentecostal/Baptist. My mother took little bits from each group and taught us what she believed to be right. She never let us fall into a "cult," and I am thankful for that.

Once I was married, I decided that I was a Baptist, after much reading the Bible, I believe that they are the closest in the translation of it. I felt that AG made the Bible what they wanted it to be, it seemed like the church would make the verses what they needed them to be at that moment. I felt that Pentecostal's were the very definition of cult, so that was out of the question.

So I settled into a Baptist church with my family years ago. In the beginning it was wonderful. The people were so welcoming, and very understanding of the way we lived. Things changed quickly. Almost overnight all of the women were pressured to wear skirts, whether it was their own personal conviction or not. Women were expected to homeschool their children, regardless of the strains it may cause on the family. Cable and internet were strictly prohibited. (Our family had both, and we were heathens.) The pastor and his family made everyone feel so welcome, but once you weren't the new family, you were no longer special. Men were expected to ONLY work jobs that allowed fr Sunday's and Wednesday nights off. Missing a service would start a chaotic outburst of gossip. Once you were no longer an asset to the church, you were no longer wanted or needed. By the time you realized this, the church had taken such control of your life that you had no other identity, and your family relationships were no longer the same. Leaving is near impossible, because of the fear that fills you...fear of not having your "family." But believe me, those people are NOT family!

It was only after I left that I started to realize just how deep in we were. At one point, my 3 year old son looked up to me and asked me if our pastor was God?!?! I have never been so shocked about something, a 3 year old could see the influence that this man was having, and we couldn't. I started to realize that I had to get out about 2 year in....but my ex was more caught up in it than I was, and he did not want to leave. Of course, once we were out, we could see how stupid we were.

Cults persuade people who need to be needed into their sick ways. They see lonely people, who just need something in life. Then they make them feel welcome. Next thing you know, you are one of the many drones walking around being told what to do. Arg! It is sick. I hate it.

I have always loved God...that will never change. But I believe that everything I do in my Christian walk should be based on my own personal convictions, not what I am told "should be my conviction."

This is a quote that is so inspiring to me...


"When you meet the friendliest people you have ever known, who introduce you to the most loving group of people you've ever encountered, and you find the leader to be the most inspired, caring, compassionate and understanding person you've ever met, and then you learn the cause of the group is something you never dared hope could be accomplished, and all of this sounds too good to be true-it probably is too good to be true! Don't give up your education, your hopes and ambitions to follow a rainbow."

Jeannie Mills
Ex - member of The People's Temple, later found murdered



Also, this list is something that everyone should read...


Are Cults Harmful?

To remain within the strict mental and social confines of a cult for even a short time can have the following disastrous effects:

Loss of choice and free will.
Diminished intellectual ability, vocabulary and sense of humour.
Reduced use of irony, abstractions and metaphors.
Reduced capacity to form flexible and intimate relationships.
Poor judgement.
Physical deterioration.
Malnutrition.
Hallucinations, panic, dissociation, guilt, identity diffusion and paranoia.
Neurotic, psychotic or suicidal tendencies.

If you know someone in a cult, and there is a good chance that we all know SOMEONE that is in one, or leaning towards joining one, this advice may help you...

How Do I Help a Cult Member? - The Do's and Don'ts

The Do's

DO try to keep in regular contact via mail or telephone even if there is little response.

DO express sincere love for the cult member at every available opportunity.

DO keep a diary of comments, attitudes and events associated with his/her life in the cult.

DO always welcome the cult member back into the family home no matter what is said.

DO keep copies of all written correspondence from you and the individual.

DO record all the names, addresses and phone numbers of people linked with the cult.

DO try to bite your tongue if the cult member makes unkind comments.

DO read all of the recommended books relating to cults and mind control, as well as reading other information on the cult in question.

DO seek help and information from organisations specialising in counter-cult work. We care about you and your individual situation.


The Don'ts

DO NOT rush into adopting a potential solution before carefully researching the cult problem.

DO NOT say:"You are in a cult; you are brainwashed".

DO NOT give money to the member of the group.

DO NOT feel guilty. This is not a problem caused by families.

DO NOT act in an angry or hostile manner towards the cult member.

DO NOT feel alone. It happens to thousands of families every year.

DO NOT underestimate the control the cult has over a member.

DO NOT antagonise the cult member by ridiculing his/her beliefs.

DO NOT be judgemental or confrontational towards the cult member.

DO NOT antagonise any of the cult's leadership or members.

DO NOT be persuaded by a cult 'specialist' to pay large sums of money without verifying his/her qualifications.

DO NOT give up hope of success in helping your family member to leave the group no matter how long the involvement has already been

DO NOT neglect yourself or other family members.

All I want for my children is for them to grow up and do what they feel is right in their heart. No church, no group, no enthusutastic preacher telling them what they believe the Bible to mean. I want them to grow up and read it for themselves, and prayerfully ask God to show them what HE wants for their lives. I will NEVER let them be a part of that mess that I was once in...never again...lesson learned.

Remember- going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to McDonald's makes you a hamburger. :)

I'm not excusing the need for church, but find a place that does not dictate you every move, your every thought. It will be hard, but the end rewards are amazing.