My boys are growing up so fast, and I just cannot stop it- no matter how hard I try. :'(
Today is Michael's 10th birthday, and I still call him my baby. It really does seem like yesterday that I was in the hospital being rushed to the OR to deliver my newest angel.
Michael came early, just like his brother, but his birth complications were far worse. I had the emergency cesarean, and the quickly took the "blue baby" out of the room. Justin and I did not get to see him for a little while.
I will NEVER, EVER forget the first time I laid my eyes on him, I just thought quietly to myself, there is my little miracle. He was in an incubator, hooked to IV's, and breathing machines, and even had a feeding tube in. It was the saddest thing ever. But, through the the gas, past all the tubes and tape, I saw those little blue eyes and I loves him more than anything.
Seeing Michael was so much harder for me than seeing Samuel. When Samuel was born, Joel cut the cord, the nurses cleaned him, and the I saw him for the first time while Joel was holding him. He was chubby and pink, the ideal looking baby...no tubes, no IV's, no incubator. When Michael was born I had those same expectations, but I have learned that you cannot expect anything with childbirth. It is painful, long, exciting, and unpredictable all at once.
Ten years since I have given birth, I keep saying it, and it still doesn't seem real. I am so thankful to have my boys today. They both have some health problems, but God is taking care of them. And, for the most part, they are happy, healthy, normal boys. I love them more than any words can describe, I could write about my love for them all day, and it would not do it justice. God has entrusted me with these two miracles, and I thank Him everyday for that. I love being their mother.
Birthday's are always hard on me, because I cannot help but reflect on the past, and try to predict the future. I go through pictures and think about every step of their lives, from their first steps, to the first words they read, to their first crushes. I just sit back and soak it all in on their birthday, and I try to imagine the men they will become, and the kinds of lives they will lead. I am so proud of them, and I know they will both do great things.
Okay, now I am getting teary, and this is supposed to be a happy blog about Michael's birthday. I better shut up.
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