Samuel-
He is doing much better today. I took him out for an hour or so, but after that he needed to come home and sleep. The doctor said he needs to REST REST REST for the next few weeks. He is so mad about that. I also have to take him to a GI doctor to find out why he got C Diff. The doc said it is so uncommon in kids, almost unheard of...and their office has NEVER had a case of C Diff in a child. I also have to take him to an ENT to see if removing his tonsils and adenoids will reduce the risk of Strep enough to go through with it. But before all of that, we have to go to his immunologist (on the 19th) to see what in the world is going on in his tiny body. I just know he is gonna get poked and prodded, I am not looking forward to that day. Please keep praying for my baby...his little body has a hard time fighting infections. I know that God can pull him through this...so believers, BELIEVE WITH ME!
Michael-
Believe this or not...Michael is getting sick. He has been having on and off nausea and sore throat. If he doesn't start to improve by Thursday I am taking him in. Just to be sure that he doesn't have strep or something that he can give to Samuel. Michael fights off illnesses very well, he is my normal kid. I am so GRATEFUL to have a normal kid!! :) He goes to the Endo at the end of the month for his yearly thyroid check-up...pray that everything comes back normal. We really don't want him to ever have to go on Synthroid again if we can help it.
Me-
I am still continuing to take things day by day...sometimes hour by hour. But God has really seen me through this, and I handle each day a little better. Sometimes my mind will wonder back to the early days of our marriage and dating...that is what sets me off...so I try to stay occupied. I am still struggling with this whole single parenting thing, it is NO cake walk. I think that things will get easier when school starts back for all three of us. I am still trying to come up with the boys' school money, but I haven't a dime of it yet. I got the monthly payment book in the mail last week, it will be over 600 a month...and that is WITH the 2000 dollar scholarship they were awarded. I am so thankful that school gave us anything, and 2000 is a lot of money. It was a blessing to me. It may be a blessing for another family if I can't come up with the rest of it. I do everything I can no to bounce stuff, and my bills are slowly drowning us. But at the end of the day, I have to trust God to see us through this...He always ALWAYS has. Like I have said many times, I have been through MANY fires that God helped me through.
Faith-
Let me just tell you something...it is so easy to lay in bed and think and cry instead of calling out to God. At first, I felt guilty for calling out to God, like I only called on Him when I needed Him. But I could not get through those first days without Him. Slowly I started to get better and I noticed that my prayer life wasn't as strong as it was when all of this first happened. The guilt was horrible. I had so much on my mind that I didn't want to pray. I know how very wrong that is, I don't need anyone to preach at me. I am a once saved always saved person...so I was never one of those "if I don't pray everyday I will go to hell." The bottom line is, if you are truly saved, you will WANT to pray, and you will WANT a relationship with God. And of course I did want that. And I am not someone to ever abandon my beliefs or even question them, or even question God about my life circumstances...that is just not who I am. I am just saying that I am human, and I let flesh take over, and let my spiritual life slide. But I don't want that to happen again, I want to stay on track, no matter how complicated life gets. You know, I am not sure why I even felt the need to share this. Hmm.
Family-
I have said it a million times, but my mom and Steve have been my rock throughout this entire ordeal. They continue to help me with every single extra dime that they have, and it is seriously hurting them financially. But they want the kids and I to be taken care of. What an amazing love they have shown us. They not only help us financially, but also spiritually. When we start to get down, they quickly lift us up with scriptures that apply to our very need. God has given them so much wisdom in how to deal with others in pain.
I am also thankful that God mended the relationship with my brother and I. When we quit talking so many years ago, I spent at least a dozen nights crying about how much I missed him. I would pray and pray that God would one day help us reunite, and He has. :)
Okay....I was gonna get into FRIENDS....but it is 11...and that is gonna be one long subject. Maybe that will be my blog tomorrow, dedicated to each and every one of you have helped throughout this...and I am naming names!!!! :o)~
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