I was doing so good...

Today started off okay. I got up and got my boys ready for church. We were gonna stay for Sunday School and Church but I just couldn't do it. About 4 people asked where my husband was this morning, and I had to tell them. Saying it out loud messed me up. I hate crying in front of people, but there I was, a blubbering idiot.

Anywho, as soon as Sunday School was over I hightailed it out of there. I kind of felt guilty....God is the only one helping me through this, He is the only one that can give me peace...and here I am, leaving church. But I just couldn't do it, I am gonna go back tonight, hopefully I will be better by then.

I think a lot of the emotions are also because tomorrow is the one month mark since he left...and Wednesday is our ten year anniversary. It is going to be one rough week. I just wish I could not be sad anymore, I am ready for the "time" to start kicking in...you know the "time" in "time heals all wounds."

I will shut up now, it was just a bad morning, and I needed to blog for some sort of release. Hopefully I can have a positive blog up tonight.